The Brave New Vacume has arrived
Published on August 12, 2007
By
Zydor
In
Misc
It had all been met by chuckles over breakfast back in that Sunday Morning in August of 2007 when Mr Claramunt of Galactic Suite announced the start of a $6Bn project to place in orbit a new Hotel, for which guests would pay a mere $4m for each stay of a few days. "I'm hopeful that the impact of seeing the earth from a distance will stimulate the guests urge to value and protect our planet" he had announced at the launch. Great Man, Great Man I thought, Visionary, the icon of vacume environmentalists. What a success it had been, I had pondered as I watched the 50 million gallon disposable fuel tanks from the shuttle ship burn up in the upper atmosphere, good to see we were not leaving junk lying around in space.
"May I float your bags sir?" the crackly voice of the bellhop had uttered over the fusion powered internal communication system in the orbiting Green Bay Hotel. His backpack had sported the latest in energy efficient MEDS (movement enhancement devices) and regulation efficiency badges declaring their benign effect on the vacume outside that was so "essential" to our future happiness and well being. I was feeling less than sprightly gazing vacantly at the breakfast table top. I had forgotten to attach the restraint straps in my bed and woken up at three in the morning upside down with my nose pressed up to the vision enhancement device (window).
Still, I pondered thoughtfully, I had done well, after all they had given me an Executive room. Ok it wasn’t a Presidential Suite that were allocated to third class, much less the Ultimate Experience rooms occupied by first class guests, but they had clearly noted my natural abilities, else why give me an Executive room? Yup I had clearly gone up in the world. I was happy and content that this year that I had done my bit for the Vacume Environment by coming here, after all the 100,000 ton composite alloy structure that made up the Hotel had been built from natural materials, and well, that’s important you know.
I gazed hopefully out the vision enhancement observation port, the brochure had promised that the recently discovered Holy Grail in geo-stationary orbit could be easily seen from the dining module, but I guess it was a little early. The waiters MEDS were very good here I observed as he floated past handing over the breakfast tubes. The hotel had assured me that the concentrated puree paste offered in many flavours contained only natural ingredients, so whilst I drank my ham and eggs I gazed hopefully again out the vision enhancement observation port, nope nothing yet. However I managed to get sight of the Fusion Generator Module, magnificent, and only used the energy of five Suns - huge improvement on last years version.
The sudden buzz of excitement amongst other guests had roused my attention. Sure enough, there it was, majestically floating into view as the hotel rotated around its vacume friendly core of Fusion Generators. The Holy Grail was a marvelous sight as it swung into view, glinting majestically against the backdrop of the vastness of the Universe, although I did think the McDonald’s advert on its hotel side was going a litte far.